SHIT HAPPENS

hey guys..

it has been a while since the last time i wrote sumthing in here. right now, my mind is a little bit disturbed.. mainly becoz of MINORITY REPORT, which is airing now.. though, it's ending. ok. now, it ends.

anyway, as i was saying, my mind is a little bit disturbed now. there's my A2, which is MESSING with my head BIG TIME, and i am not even prepared for it yet. then, my bestfriend had just left, and im almost alone here. i know i still have super, awesome great friend around me (THANX A LOT u guys for being as great as always. love u all), but, u know how it feels like when u lost 'YOUR PERSON' -- u know, that someone who u always go to when u have problems, the person who u will call when u just found out bout the lamest joke ever.. the person who u will share ur secrets, ur big moments in life -- be it ur happy moments, or sad moments.. u know.. so, when u dont have 'YOUR PERSON' around u and reachable, then, u will feel EXACTLY how i feel right now..

and then, there's this feeling/emotional conflict that i had been having for quite a while now.. the confusion, the frustration, the waiting, the mountain-high hopes, the endless/bottomless pit.. owkay, to make it simple, let me illustrate it to u how this feeling/emotional conflict that im having now : it's like, when u are enjoying the scenery of a forest in autumn, with all the leaves had fallen to the ground.. and the grasses are green, the wind are blowing gently through your hair.. and suddenly, u fall into this pit but at the same time u still can enjoy the view, but the problem is u keep on falling and falling and falling.. and it seems like there are no end to this pit. it's bottomless.. and  along the way u keep on trying to grab on something, so that at least u can stop falling, and climb back up, but everytime u tried to reach that something, it keeps on breaking and letting u fall... and fall.. and fall.. and frankly speaking, i am still falling.. i still cant find that solid 'something' for me to hold on to from the pit's wall.. and i am still falling.. i hate it. i hate it so much that my heart is aching. this is too painful to bear, ok. i just hope.. agh! i just hope everything will be over soon. and this pit. stop being a pit. just let the wall falls of, and return me back on solid ground. im too tired of falling now.. i dont care if i still can enjoy the view..just let me be elsewhere.. i hate the pit now. i hate it. agh! if only anyone even understand what im talking bout here..

u know how i keep telling myself and everyone around me: LIFE IS HOW YOU MAKE IT. and some other inspiring quotes about life. but what surprise me is that, i cant seem to make the quotes inspire MY life. how suck is tat?

gosh.. i hate myself for thinking TOO MUCH on unnecessary things like this. i just hope i can just focus on my A2 now.. and let watever happens, happens. (i hope.. sigh~)

am too depressed to write anything now. and to raiz and yasz, HAPPY BIRTHDAY. (that is, if by any chance u guys are reading this)

alryte all.. till the next time, u will be hearing from me again.. thanx for reading. bye.

:: summer_breeze ::